Verb Master 動詞達人

#一頁書英文閱讀 Vanity Card #187

The Big Bang Theory 1-4

今天的一頁書是用火星文寫的，內容講The Big Bang Theory的靈感來源，原來是有一個叫Sheldon Leonard的不死幽靈，把製作人Chuck Lorre當靈媒(channel)，製作了一系列情境喜劇(sitcom)，但是Lorre是個大笨蛋，從來沒有一片按照Sheldon Leonard的意思來演

一頁書閱讀今天起分四級：

百世經綸級：閱讀原文

清香白蓮級：閱讀分段後原文

亂世狂刀級：閱讀分段含中文註釋

黑白郎君級：閱讀中英對照

秦假仙級：需要請徐葳幫忙ABC

【中英文劇情提要】

Sheldon is fired from his job as a physicist(物理學家) at the university when he insults(羞辱) his new boss Dr. Eric Gablehauser.

Sheldon因為羞辱新老闆Eric博士而丟掉大學物理學家的工作

His change of circumstance(環境的改變) sends him into a downward spiral of depression(心情急轉直下) which results in working on(進行…工作) developing luminous fish(螢光魚) for nightlights(小夜燈) and buying a loom(織布機) for himself.

環境的改變，讓他的心情急轉直下，於是開始進行他小夜燈螢光魚的研發，還給自己買一台織布機

Worried, Leonard calls Sheldon's mother, Mary Cooper.

這讓Leonard很擔心，於是打電話給Sheldon的媽媽Mary Cooper

When she arrives for a visit(抵達訪問), the men realize she is completely the opposite of what they expected: she is sweet(親切), down-to-earth(務實誠實的), a devout(虔誠的) Christian, and a really good and loving(有愛心的) and caring(關心人的) mother.

當她親自來拜訪的時候，大家才明白原來她跟想像中的人剛好相反：親切、務實、虔誠的基督徒，非常好的媽媽，有愛心又會關心人

Mary finally forces Sheldon to apologize, and he is given his job back after she flirts with(打情罵俏) Dr. Gablehauser.

Mary終於成功強迫Sheldon去道歉，她跟Gablehauser博士一陣打情罵俏之後，Sheldon要回了工作

【百世經綸】 【一頁書 火星版原文】

CHUCK LORRE PRODUCTIONS, #187

Awright, shut up, siddown and listen. I am da immortal spirit Sheldon Leonard and for da last few years I've been using da body of Chuck Lorre to channel my ideas for new sitcoms. For da record, he's a stinkin' lousy channel and my ideas are much better than what he's puttin' on television. Dis is why I am breaking my anonymity. No matter how specifical I tell da kid what to write, he still manages to cock it up. Dharma & Greg? What da hell was dat? I specifically said "do a show about a queer guy who loves a straight chick, and she loves him back, but they can't, you know, bump uglies." But does Lorre listen? No way Jose. The putz turns it inside out, winds up with hippie chick loves uptight lawyer and then wonders why he can't buy an Emmy. (I did find a writing team to act as a channel for dat pitch, which worked out pretty good, Emmy and cash-wise.) Anyway, back to Lorre. Couple years later while he's sleepin', I whisper to him, "Two brudders inherit a midget." Funny, right? What's Lorre do? You got it. Two and a Half Men. Gimme a break! Anyway, I decide to give the mook one last chance. While he's under da gas at the dentist, I tell him to do a show about four wise guys and a sexy dame what knows da score. So what does da knucklehead do? Scientists and a waitress! It just breaks my heart. But at least the dope managed to slip my name in dis one. Now if you'll excuse me, I gotta schlep over to Milton Berle's crypt for a little pinochle with the boys.

【清香白蓮】【一頁書 地球人修訂版】

Alright, shut up, sit down and listen.

I am the immortal spirit Sheldon Leonard and for the last few years I've been using the body of Chuck Lorre to channel my ideas for new sitcoms.

For the record, he's a stinking lousy channel and my ideas are much better than what he's putting on television.

This is why I am breaking my anonymity.

No matter how specific I tell the kid what to write, he still manages to cock it up.

Dharma & Greg? What the hell was that?

I specifically said "do a show about a queer guy who loves a straight chick, and she loves him back, but they can't, you know, bump uglies."

But does Lorre listen? No way Jose. The putz turns it inside out, winds up with hippie chick loves uptight lawyer and then wonders why he can't buy an Emmy.

 (I did find a writing team to act as a channelfor that pitch, which worked out pretty good, Emmy and cash-wise.)

Anyway, back to Lorre. Couple years later while he's sleeping, I whisper to him, "Two brothers inherit a midget."

Funny, right? What's Lorre do? You got it. Two and a Half Men. Give me a break!

Anyway, I decide to give the mook one last chance.

While he's under the gas at the dentist, I tell him to do a show about four wise guys and a sexy damewhat knows the score.

So what does the knucklehead do? Scientists and a waitress! It just breaks my heart.

But at least the dope managed to slip my name in this one.

Now if you'll excuse me, I gotta schlep over to Milton Berle's crypt for a little pinochle with the boys.

【亂世狂刀】【一頁書 英文分段註解】

Alright, shut up, sit down and listen. I am the immortal spirit(不死靈魂) Sheldon Leonard and for the last few years I've been using the body of Chuck Lorre to channel(通靈) my ideas for new sitcoms(情境劇).

For the record(我先聲明), he's a stinking lousy(又臭又遜的) channel(通靈體、肉身) and my ideas are much better than what he's putting on television(電視上撥放).

This is why I am breaking my anonymity(匿名、隱姓埋名).

No matter how specific(明確的) I tell the kid what to write, he still manages to(設法去) cock it up(弄糟、搞砸).

Dharma & Greg(老公老婆不登對, 1997-2002)? What the hell was that?

I specifically said(明確地說) "do a show about a queer guy(男同志) who loves a straight chick(正常女生), and she loves him back, but they can't, you know, bump uglies(嘿咻)."

But does Lorre listen? No way Jose(老兄，發音”猴血”). The putz(白痴大笨蛋) turns it inside out(顛倒過來、全反過來), winds up with(結果變成) hippie chick(嬉皮女) loves uptight(正經八百、很ㄍㄧㄥ的) lawyer and then wonders why he can't buy(唬) an Emmy(艾美獎).

 (I did find a writing team to act as a channel(渠道) for that pitch(宣傳), which worked out(達成結果) pretty good, Emmy and cash-wise(能賺錢的).)

Anyway, back to Lorre. Couple years later while he's sleeping, I whisper(耳語) to him, "Two brothers inherit(繼承) a midget(侏儒、小鬼頭)."

Funny, right? What's Lorre do? You got it.(答對了) Two and a Half Men(男人兩個半, 2013-2015). Give me a break(饒了我吧、真是拜託幫幫忙)!

Anyway, I decide to give the mook(混帳王八蛋) one last chance.

While he's under the gas(戴氧氣罩) at the dentist(在牙醫院), I tell him to do a show about four wise guys and a sexy dame(查某人) what knows the score(知道實情、懂人情世故).

So what does the knucklehead(傻瓜呆) do? Scientists and a waitress! It just breaks my heart.

But at least the dope(笨蛋) managed to slip(放置) my name in this one.

Now if you'll excuse me(不好意思), I gotta schlep over to(費力的去某地) Milton Berle's crypt(古時教堂地下墓室) for a little pinochle(美國皮納克爾紙牌遊戲) with the boys.

【黑白郎君】【一頁書 中英對照】

Alright, shut up, sit down and listen.

好，大家閉嘴，坐下來聽我說

I am the immortal spirit Sheldon Leonard and for the last few years I've been using the body of Chuck Lorre to channel my ideas for new sitcoms.

我是不朽神靈Sheldon Leonard，過去幾年，我一直用製作人Chuck Lorre的身體來通靈，轉達我對情境劇的理念

For the record, he's a stinking lousy channel and my ideas are much better than what he's putting on television.

我先聲明，他是又臭又遜的肉體，我的理念比他在電視上播放的好太多了

This is why I am breaking my anonymity.

這就是我為何我打破隱姓埋名出來跟大家講話的原因

No matter how specific I tell the kid what to write, he still manages to cock it up.

不管我跟這個小鬼講的有多明確，他總是會搞砸

Dharma & Greg? What the hell was that?

老公老婆不登對？拍的這是什麼玩意兒？

I specifically said "do a show about a queer guy who loves a straight chick, and she loves him back, but they can't, you know, bump uglies."

我明確地這麼講：「製作一部關於男同志愛上正常女孩的故事，女孩後來也愛上他，但是他們不能那個那個，你知道我的意思。」

But does Lorre listen? No way Jose. The putz turns it inside out, winds up with hippie chick loves uptight lawyer and then wonders why he can't buy an Emmy.

你知道Lorre聽成什麼嗎？不會吧，老兄，這個白痴大笨蛋完全顛倒過來，結果變成嬉皮女愛上正經八百的律師，然後還在想他為什麼弄不到艾美獎

 (I did find a writing team to act as a channelfor that pitch, which worked out pretty good, Emmy and cash-wise.)

(我後來的確找到一個劇本組，當它做宣傳渠道，效果相當不錯，除了得艾美獎還能賺錢)

Anyway, back to Lorre. Couple years later while he's sleeping, I whisper to him, "Two brothers inherit a midget."

不管了，會來講Lorre這個人，幾年前他在睡覺的時候，我在他耳邊說：「兩個哥哥養一個小鬼。」

Funny, right? What's Lorre do? You got it. Two and a Half Men. Give me a break!

很好玩吧？Lorre怎麼做呢？答對了，男人兩個半，真是拜託幫幫忙

Anyway, I decide to give the mook one last chance.

總之，我決定給這個混帳王八蛋再一次機會

While he's under the gas at the dentist, I tell him to do a show about four wise guys and a sexy damewhat knows the score.

有一回他在牙醫院戴氧氣罩的時候，我告訴他製作一部關於四個聰明的男人加上一個精通人情世故的性感的查某

So what does the knucklehead do? Scientists and a waitress! It just breaks my heart.

這個傻瓜呆怎麼搞知道嗎？科學家和女服務生！太讓我傷心了

But at least the dope managed to slip my name in this one.

但至少這笨蛋設法把我的名字放進戲裡面

Now if you'll excuse me, I gotta schlep over to Milton Berle's crypt for a little pinochle with the boys.

不好意思，我得移駕去米爾頓伯利家的地下墓穴跟幾個男孩子玩皮納克爾紙牌

【CHUCK LORRE PRODUCTIONS, #187】